#1 – Us.
When our kids ask us questions and we give them “stork” answer, tell them we’ll get back with them later and then don’t, or if we’re not even comfortable bringing it up, they will “hear” us saying that sex is bad. That silence says a lot…our kids are smart!
#2 – Peers.
Does this one even require an explanation? I have yet to hear a story where a kid learned solid evidence-based information from another kid.
#3 – Leaders.
A majority of schools are required to teach abstinence-only sex education. Generally, we’re hearing the same from many churches. When we were in high school youth group, we participated in ‘True Love Waits’ – a purity movement where youth wore purity rings and signed pledge cards. Shannon did a study on the negative impacts of ‘True Love Waits’ on people our ages and the findings were devastating – guilt, difficulty having sex in marriage, and confusion about lines and how to manage sexual desire in relationships.
Translation: “Just don’t do it.”
It’s been proven time and time again that it has a negative impact (higher pregnancy rates, more STIs, earlier first intercourse, etc.), and we can do better!
#4 – Experts.
Our pediatrician can be an amazing resource! It’s always a good idea to ask our pediatricians for advice when it comes to the well-being of our kids. However, because they have limited time and resources, they will sometimes default to the classic “scare” tactic approach.
“If you have sex, you will get an STD, you will get pregnant, you will never go to college, and you will ruin your life.”
What message does that send? How will that mindset impact their future relationships?
If kids have a negative experience, parents should contact a licensed therapist immediately. If you’re looking to become the go-to person for your kids, then you’ve come to the right place. Oh. My. Word.’s “Not The Talk” is for you!
#5 – T.V.
We see more and more sex on prime-time television every single day. The networks are trying to get the attention of millions of desensitized Americans, and they’ll do anything to get it. I have been tempted to convert my television into a fish tank more than once…but I also want to preserve my marriage and my husband is an avid sports fan.
If somehow their peers don’t get to them, television WILL. And that’s a best-case scenario! We also have to contend with pornography. With phones, laptops, and tablets at their fingertips, our kids are one quick click away from full blown porn. Most studies show, on average, children will be exposed to porn (often unintentionally) around ages 10-13.
It’s not a matter of IF our kids will see porn, it’s a matter of WHEN. And I’m not willing to let the sex industry get to my kids before I do.
Our kids deserve better answers. Let Oh. My. Word. help you pass that legacy on to them with our convenient, and fun online audio course.
Comment below about how you learned sex was bad.